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Becoming a Maryland Medical Cannabis Patient with (Almost) Tears: A Complicated Short Story

Welcome to a new year! Cannabis can be apart of your resolutions, especially if you live in a legal state to get a legal medical cannabis card. There’s plenty of benefit once you get it.

But becoming a legal cannabis patient can be… trying.

My name is Alaina and I’m a medical cannabis patient in Maryland. I work in the industry as a writer and here’s my tale.

Summer Attempt

2018 was a harrowing year for me and pushed me into the arms of cannabis for mental solace. I was unstable financially, my relationships crumbled and imploded, and I couldn’t seem to grasp my footing.

I was officially diagnosed with anxiety and depression early summer by my lackluster therapist. She insisted I get on medication to stabilize. And that’s cannabis became a regular part of my life.

I experienced relief from smoking in the past, so I submitted my application to the Maryland Medical Cannabis Commission in June.

Vicki Doe Fitness
Photo Credit: Vickie Doe Fitness

November Resubmission

My application was kicked back because I was awful at filling it out. That’s how whacked out my brain was–I could barely comprehend all the instructions. I started vaping CBD in the meantime.

November rolled around and I hadn’t corrected my application. Since my living situation was now stable, I strapped my ass down and updated my application.

Certification in Early December

When I initially submitted my application, I uploaded an incorrect photo and hadn’t fulfilled the requirement for providing additional proof of address. The address for when I applied was different from the one of my license (my parents’ address).

I double-checked the requirements: a photo “with nothing obscuring the face, such as a hat or sunglasses.” So I submitted the photo below (my face isn’t obscured) and updated to my parents’ address since I was staying with them.

Now certations kinda comes after getting your patient number, but I went ahead and got it out of the way. I took my therapy discharge papers (yes, broke up with my uncool therapist), paid a reasonable fee of $100 and went on my way.

As of December 2017, it can cost $22-200 to get certified depending on the location and if you have background as a veteran.

Then I waited.

Another Returned Application

While enjoying a day off with my 420 homie, I got the MMCC email.

And my application was returned.

I apparently still needed to update my address. My photo was “wrong.”

And I was pissed.

At this point, processing took up to 30 days for returned applications or 45 whole days for new patients!

I wasn’t waiting anymore.

Becoming a patient was for my daily function. And it was a business move to get face-to-face with my community.

The Call

On December 14, I dialed up MMCC around 8:30AM. I stated I had a discrepancy with my application and was met with the rudest phone rep. She literally huffed and puffed while pulling up my info and kept talking over me!

She reluctantly acknowledged the address issue was their fault but insisted I was wrong about the hat photo.

I ended the call with her. But decided that wasn’t the end.

I called back and asked to speak to a supervisor. Who was also rude! It wasn’t even 9AM on a Friday. I got on her about how the wording on the site doesn’t match their attempt to reject me.

Then I demanded to speak with her manager.

And once I was on the phone with the director of blah, I let my anxiety take over. I was angry to almost tears, heated and trembling.

And it also meant I could garner sympathy because I’m also a damn patient with a mental illness!

So I told her my negative experiences when calling and let my anxiety hang all the way out.

She acknowledged she could hear how anxious I was and said she’d approve me as soon as she received my photo via her direct email.

I was approved by 11AM.

Alaina Dorsey
My Not-So-Cool official pictures

Always Self Advocate

Becoming a medical cannabis patient is about being your biggest advocate. And it’s about following through on tasks that will help you better your life.

I persevered despite having a very sick mind, but this is a story about what it may take to get legal access to cannabis.If you know weed helps you best, keep on pushing and get what you need!

Alaina Dorsey is “Baltimore’s best cannabis content writer and strategist.” She’s contributed to Leafly, Experts of Herb and Pure CBD vapors.

Alaina Dorsey
Alaina Dorseyhttp://www.alainadorsey.com
Alaina Dorsey is a freelance cannabis content marketing writer at her Baltimore-based business Bud Biz Chick in Maryland. For dispensaries and online cannabis businesses, she writes the chillest patron-focused content that educated and sells. Quirks available upon request at www.alainadorsey.com.
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